Day 20

To the Person Who Broke My Heart the Hardest,

I was 17 and you were the first real boyfriend I had. We had been dating for over 2 years, which is like 20 in teenage years. I remember I had wanted to break up with you earlier that year but when I broached the subject with you, you started crying and I felt so bad I couldn't do it. While in school everything remained the same. But when you ditched me at our prom to go God knows where with your friends, I knew things had changed. Not long later it was our 2 1/2 year anniversary and again, you went out with your friends (or was it your family?). I called you later that day to say we needed to talk. I went to your house and we sat on your front steps and I asked you point blank what was happening. You told me you wanted to be single before starting college in the fall. What a douche thing to say. I'm sorry but I think it was pretty crappy what you did. You couldn't bear the thought of being single in high school but once college loomed you didn't want to be tied down. What's worse, you didn't say straight out that's what you wanted. You said you weren't sure. Ha! So I told you to make up your mind. You did and I called my dad to come pick me up. Of course I was crying and my poor dad didn't know what to say so he didn't say anything. When I got home I told my mom and sobbed and sobbed. You broke my heart and you did it for a shitty reason. And you left it up to me to get the truth out of you. If I hadn't confronted you, would you have simply continued to ignore me? True, it ended up for the best because I started dating my husband that fall. So maybe I should thank you. Or maybe not. It bothered me for a long time. Rejection hurts, especially from your first boyfriend. I haven't thought about it for a long time and it's only this letter challenge that has forced me to re-live it. I'm blessed to be able to say that I'm content: I want what I have. What happened doesn't matter anymore.

Melissa